You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
