she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
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