no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
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