o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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