i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
