The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
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