I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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