He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
