Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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