i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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