its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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