any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
