Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I want a musical about memes.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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