Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Randomize
