I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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