I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize
