I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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