Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
