ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I need moral support for this bender
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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