let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
