At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Randomize