have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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