Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
