I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I believe in your delicious
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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