i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
