Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
whose ass print is on the piano?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
