Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
