I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
