just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
