he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
