Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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