get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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