Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
