we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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