I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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