i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
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