we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
