they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Enjoy the penises
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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