After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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