If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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