I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize