he puts the penis in happiness.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
