Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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