"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Randomize
