it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
