its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
