You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
