Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Randomize
