I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
