I wanna bring you to show and tell
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.